Friday, October 31, 2008
No Birds Were Harmed In The Making Of This Costume (But Some PVC May Have Suffered A Little)
Have you noticed how cheaply made the costumes are and the ever increasing prices for said poorly made costumes? At least when I was a kid the cheap costumes were actually CHEAP.
Do you recall the circa 1975 store bought costumes? A long thin sheet of plastic with the body of Princess Leia, or Mickey Mouse, or Darth Vader printed on one side and the character's rear view printed on the other. With a hole in the middle to stick your head through. To complete the look you had a plastic mask with a elastic band around the back of your head. And if your mask got ripped (which it always did) it had WICKED sharp edges with which to slice your face or poke out your eyeball. Good thing you weren't actually using your eyes to see where you were going.
These masks had holes cut out for your eyes, nostrils and mouth. Rarely did these holes actually line up with your eyes, nose, or mouth, thus ensuring hordes of children stumbling around the street in the dark.
And to top it off, if you lived in Pittsburgh, your Mom probably made you wear your coat over the costume anyway. So really just a bunch of kids in winter coats with brightly printed badly designed plastic covering their eyes tripping over the curbs and steps.
The costume of this type that stands out most in my mind is a Tweety Bird costume.
I'm not even sure it was my costume. It may have been one of my cousins' or possibly a neighbor's.
But for some reason I can still see this (sort of scary now that I'm looking at a photo of it) mask and smell the cheap plastic costume in my mind.
I wonder which costume my children will recall from the depths of their memory some day.
Thursday, October 30, 2008
Dusting Off My Soapbox
Am I the only one disturbed by this ad? Never mind the adult dressed as a condescending frog.
Why shouldn't kids want to look at and actually READ the book about frogs?
And why do kids need a little electronic pen to read a book to them? Isn't that what parents are for? Will we now need an electronic device just to READ for Pete's sake?
I have nothing against Spongebob personally. I'm sure he's a really nice sponge and all, other than that laugh that makes my brain feel like it's just been rubbed against a metal cheese grater. But can't my kids (and my poor shredded brain) have a break from him for a nanosecond? Could we possibly just read Goodnight Moon? Or Guess How Much I Love You? Or even Harry Potter? Does it ALWAYS have to be about television, even when it's not television?
Excuse me while I go read Where's Spot by Eric Hill for the bajillionth time today.
I'll never get sick of it.
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
Speaking Of Genetics
Yeah it's like that.
For two weeks.
I couldn't possibly inherit the fast-metabolism-eat-anything-you-want-pretty-much-until-you're-40 gene from my Dad. Instead I was blessed with his sinuses.
I'll be back when my brains shrink back to their normal size.
Friday, October 17, 2008
Mea Culpa
And now I am off to be a guest blogger over at "Discover Boo". So come visit me over there! Boo's one of my best friends and if you haven't already, you should read her blog too!
Thursday, October 9, 2008
One Word Challenge
Doesn't stop me from forwarding it on though does it?
Your hair? dirty
Your mother? complicated
Your father? safe
Your favorite thing (not including people)? sleep (this seems to be a common theme amongst the Mamas)
Your dream last night? funny
Your dream/goal? longevity
Your favorite drink? coffee
The room you're in? kitchen
Your ex? disappeared
Your hobby? books
Your fear? loss
Where do you want to be in 6 years? elsewhere
Where were you last night? here
What you're not? skinny
Muffins? blueberry
One of your wish list items? house
Time? short
Where you grew up? Bethel
The last thing you did? Wii
Favorite weather? crisp
What are you wearing? frumpy
Favorite book? Avalon
Your TV? average
Your pet? new
Your computer? Dell
Your mood? relieved
Missing someone? Melissa
Your car? Odyssey
Something you're not wearing? socks
Favorite store? Target
Love someone? many
Favorite color/shade? yellow
Last thing you ate? grahams
Your life? full
Your friends? loyal
What are you thinking right now? KITTEN!
What are you doing at this moment? BITTEN!
Your summer? excellent
Your relationship status? married
What do you do when you can't sleep? read
When is the last time you laughed? today
Last time you cried? Saturday
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
Idiom Source Discovery
JAMIE: Mama this water is as warm as bath water.
ME: That's because it is bath water honey.
JAMIE: Oh. That makes sense then.
Friday, October 3, 2008
Wrong Species
The kitten won but only barely.
I am a new nursing mother again. I am well equipped to cope with this job having done it three times before. And pretty much like a human baby, Hermione is a moving, breathing, (loudly) mewing appetite. However I have found there are some crucial differences between species.
I find those films where they show a dog nursing a kitten, or a cat nursing a squirrel absolutely adorable. I'm all for inter-species fostering, but I have to draw the line somewhere. Kittens teeth are like little needles. Ain't coming anywhere near me with those things!
Furthermore, I will never ever complain about changing a diaper again. Did you know that you have to rub their little bums to make them go? I was growing concerned by Hermione's lack of, er, solid waste so I called the kitty pediatrician (A.K.A. our vet). I was told to vigorously stimulate her bottom with a warm wet towel.
Apparently cats lick their kitten's booty until it makes them do their thing.
I'm sorry but THERE I draw the line.